The 16th President of the United States has grown in popularity in recent months with major Hollywood Blockbusters such as Lincoln and New York Times bestsellers such as Killing Lincoln. In fact, it’d be safe to say that Abraham Lincoln is regarded as one of the greatest and most respected American Presidents to date.
Yet new evidence has come to light questioning the historical reliability of the existence of this beloved man. Alincolnists, who were content to remain silent for years, have finally decided to raise their voice and have taken a stand against what they call a myth and virus of the mind. This growing minority calls into question the historical, philosophical, and scientific probability that Abraham Lincoln actually existed.
In what is considered to be one of the most provocative and controversial Alincolnist books, Lincoln is not Great: How Belief in Abraham Lincoln Poisons Everything, Mephisto Switchin’ states:
More people died because of this fictitious, megalomaniacal, invasive, divisive, vindictive, unforgiving, militaristic, absolutist, statist, condescending, self-absorbed, obsessive, compulsive, monger of spite than any other figure in American history. If humanity is to rise to its full height as moral beings, we need to cut the umbilical cord to this monster of make-believe once and for all.
Furthermore, Tryhard Farrier, leading professor of physics at Camford University and author of Not the Impossible President, claims:
The prior probability of a person being Abraham Lincoln, a man missing a middle name, being a proficient wrestler as a young man, having a famous beard, wearing a famous hat, being an American President, invading the South and abolishing slavery, using ordinary, everyday Bayesian methods, is really, really, really, really small. So small that no matter what you multiply it by, the answer will still be really, really, really, really small. That’s how probability works.
The growing amount of unquestionable evidence has led many to walk away from their life-long belief in Lincoln’s life and legacy. When questioned on why she left the belief held by so many, one young woman commented,
I used to believe in Lincoln. How could I not when it’s all my parents ever talked about? As I got older I began to realize I only believed he existed because I grew up in a home prone to Lincoln-ness. But when I looked into it myself I realized saying Lincoln is real is like saying Santa Claus is real… it’s a childish belief that needs to be eradicated with maturity.
In an attempt to raise awareness of Alincolnism and offer support to those who have abandoned his myth, a Facebook fan page has been created entitled Did Abe Lincoln Really Exist? Its purpose is to offer a place for freethinking, rational skepticism toward the myth of Abraham Lincoln’s existence and the stories attributed to him. The group has quickly grown, jumping in numbers to the thousands within a few short hours, which has led one of the founders (who has asked to remain anonymous) to be greatly encouraged. “Finally, people are beginning to take note that the evidence against Abraham Lincoln is far greater than the evidence for him,” he said. “Once we can rid people of this ridiculous belief our society can finally begin to progress as it should.”
When asked what he hopes will come from the Alincolnist group, he responded, “I and the rest of the team hope this shows the world how ridiculous belief in this man is. The burden of proof falls upon the Lincoln believer. By interacting on our page people will see that the logic speaks for itself. There was no Abraham Lincoln.”
For further information on Alincolnism and its evidence, visit http://www.facebook.com/alincolnism
BellaKazza says
What the hell is wrong with you people? Lincoln did exist, there is evidence for his existence. This is a huge joke, I can’t believe this is made by the People of God as well. Look, I’m a Christian too, and I understand, you want to create a counter movement to the Atheistic nonsense that “Jesus didn’t exist”, but this is not the way to go about it.
Lincoln was a real man, a real evil man, you guys are acting as bad as the Linolnites and their glorifying of the man. Do some research, study history, the Linolnites don’t do that as it is, and neither are you.
James Stone says
Brilliant parody! I love the page. As an administrator on and atheist/theist discussion page, I get loads of laughs every time I visit “Did Abe Lincoln Really Exist?” Who ever came up with the idea was a genius.
Bob Seidensticker says
So Lincoln denial is like God denial?
The Lincoln story has no supernatural elements, and the God story is the boldest supernatural story ever. The difference is pretty substantial.
I discuss this in more detail here: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/crossexamined/2013/02/principle-of-analogy-2/
Brian says
No, historical Lincoln denial is like historical Jesus denial.
Bob Seidensticker says
Did a man named Jesus live 2000 years ago in Palestine and start a movement within Judaism? Sure, that’s possible. Nothing too hard to believe here. But if you look at Lincoln, Julius Caesar, Alexander, and so on, the supernatural elements have been scrubbed out. Why make an exception for the Jesus story?
Matt Brown says
really? emancipation! wrestler! a
famous beard! being an American President!
invading the South! are these not also embellishments?
pennyofathought says
The above post is about Abraham Lincoln and a group who are claiming he did not exist. God has not been mentioned.
Bob Seidensticker says
Penny: No, not directly. But is there no parody element here? Is God not a subtext?